


Klance-What Keeps Us Awake at Night

by HinnyKlance



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Physical Abuse, Psychological Trauma, Rape
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-24
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-05-13 10:38:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14747258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HinnyKlance/pseuds/HinnyKlance
Summary: Lance and Keith have a complicated friendship. Will the fears that haunt them in their sleep bring them closer together or tear them apart completely.





	1. Andrew

**Author's Note:**

> This is a work in progress and I hope to add more chapters to add character development as well as building relationships through the story. I am not the greatest writer but I hope you can see my idea's try to come to life.

Keith surprised Lance by driving to Lance’s mother’s house for his birthday. Lance could not express the happiness he felt when he opened the door and there was Keith standing in front of him. He threw his arms around him and hugged him until Keith said he couldn’t breathe. Fortunately they were home alone and Lance’s mind filled with ideas they could do, most of which involved them naked but he wasn’t about to share those with Keith.

Keith and Lance have a very complicated relationship. Lance confessed to Keith how deep of feelings he felt for him. Keith never said he didn’t return the feelings for Lance, but he never really said he did either. It left them in this complicated close but try not cross boundaries into boyfriend friendship. Lance wasn’t always sure if some comments he made, the usual flirty Lance type, cross that line but he was sure Keith would tell him if he had went to far.

Lance and Keith were about to start a game when there was a knock on the door. Confused, Lance opened the door and froze. Standing before him was his old roommate, whom he may or may not have had sexual relations with. 

“Well are you going to let me in?” He said cooly as if offended Lance had not smile and hug him.

“Um..I..uh…guess…” Lance stammered.

The man, Andrew, pushed past him and glared at Keith sitting on the couch.

“Whose he?” Andrew spat with venom in his voice

“Keith.” Keith said evenly as he held out his hand with a smirk on his face.

“So this is the reason you just dropped off the face of the earth when I took that job out west? So much for you telling me you were going to move out there with me once you saved enough money!” Andrew yelled at Lance.

“ No…I…I went back to school…I told you that… this just happens to be a friend I made there…” Lance tried to say. 

He felt small. Andrew had a way of making him feel guilty about everything. That usually how their sexual encounters came about. Andrew would start touching and kissing Lance in their bed and Lance would say no or he was too tired. Truth be told he just didn’t want to be intimate with Andrew at all. There was only one or two times in the very beginning he enjoyed the sexual portion. But it usually ended with Lance in tears. Andrew usually responded by saying that Lance only cared about himself and that he should just leave and how ugly he was until Lance finally gave in and let it happen. Just to get it over with. He always felt used and dirty after and silently cried himself to sleep nightly.

“Like I believe that this is just a friendship!” Andrew said as he slapped Lance across the face. 

Lance was used to Andrew hitting him too. Usually not that direct. Most of the time it was Andrew grabbing Lance’s arm too tight and dragging him around. Or punching him in the arms or the legs that left bruises. He pushed Lance a lot, especially when they fought, and they had fought often. It was never bad enough that anyone could see but that didn’t make Lance any less flinchy when someone raises a hand too fast or jumped out. 

With this Keith stood up and faced Andrew still smirking. “I can assure you that I am not having any kind of romance with that.” Keith said and pointed to Lance. Lance just looked at him as he felt his heart break into pieces. So that was how Keith truly felt…

“I don’t believe you for one second!” Andrew said with venom in his voice.

“Have you looked at the guy? He is hideous! No one in their right mind would want to be seen with someone that looked like that let alone sleep with it! Not to mention he is dumber than a sack of bricks. He can’t even walk in a straight line without getting lost!” Keith laughed in a deep and almost evil tone. Lance could feel the tears in his eyes. Keith had called him gorgeous just last week, had he been lying to make Lance feel better?

“Oh look you made him cry. You are really pathetic. I have told you before that you are weak. I can’t even drop a pen without bursting into tears. Its sad really. Let me really give you something to cry about.” With that Andrew punched Lance as hard as he could in the stomach. Lance doubled over and landed at the floor at Keith’s feet. 

“Why stop there?” Keith said with another dark smirk. He brought up his knee quickly and broke Lance’s nose. Lance crumbled to the floor covered in blood and tears. Why was Keith doing this? Andrew he could see but Keith?

Andrew walked over to Lance and kicked him hard in the ribs. Lance could feel them crack from the pressure and he couldn’t breathe. Andrew continued to kick Lance.

“Since I am already telling you everything, I felt so sorry for you. You would help other people and then fall apart. It was pathetic. You always needed someone to rescue you and it is sad. So I played along and helped you once in a while. But then it just became needy and it was desperate You always needed me to listen to all you stupid problems so I started ignoring the messages I knew would end with some emotional bullshit. I was hoping you would get the hint but you really are stubborn. How can you be such a pessimist about everything in your life and still try to hold on the little good you see in someone. It is pathetic really. When you told me you had feelings for me and I knew I had dug a hole I couldn’t get out of. I felt obligated to be here today because I knew you were going to do something for my birthday. I didn’t want to be here and I sure as hell don’t want to see your disgusting self on my birthday.” Keith finished in such a deep monotone voice that indicated his irritation.

Andrew had stopped kicking Lance. But Lance felt every word that came out of Keith’s mouth hit him harder than any kick would. It cut him deeper than any sword could begin to scratch. He was covered in so much blood he hoped he was dying, because emotionally he was already dead.

Keith turned and headed for the door. Andrew moved on top of Lance’s unmoving body and began to remove his clothes. Lance turned his head to see Keith open the door. Keith left him to the mercy of Andrew. Lance couldn’t move to stop Andrew as he began to tough him. Lance watched with tears streaming down his face as Keith slammed the door behind him.

Lance woke up in his bed screaming, two days before his birthday.


	2. Night Snack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Memories come back to Lance as he gets himself a midnight snack.

Chapter 2

Lance couldn’t fall back asleep so he went to the kitchen to get some food goo. If he was lucky Hunk made too much of something last night and he could eat the leftovers. 

He couldn’t understand it. Why had he dreamed of Andrew? He hadn’t seen him since he had left for the Garrison. Andrew had been his trainer at the fast food place he worked at prior to his acceptance to the Garrison.

He and Andrew became close friends and decided to get a place together closer to work so that Lance didn’t have to drive an hour to and from. Once they had moved in they became inseparable. Lance being demisexual he began to explore the sexual attraction he had towards Andrew once that emotional bond had formed. He quickly learned though that sexual attraction did not mean romantic attraction so they never dated. He soon did not become fond of the sexual encounters between him and Andrew and that is when things had changed. 

He hadn’t told anyone his sexuality, but he hadn’t tried to hide it either. He just was more flirtatious with women because he was scared of being attracted to someone like Andrew. When he realized he had feelings for Keith it terrified him. Hell it still terrifies him. He knew Keith wouldn’t hurt him, at least not physically, but he also knew he had fallen for Keith too hard and too fast. All Keith would have to do is tell him to jump, and Lance being who he is would say on one leg or two? But the fact that Keith could have that power over him terrified Lance. He couldn’t really pin point exactly when he began falling for Keith but he knew it got stronger every day, even with them apart while he did his Blade of Marmora missions. 

He wanted to tell Keith about the nightmare but he didn’t know what kind of response he would get. Usually Lance just talked and Keith listened. Sometimes Keith would make comments, usually blunt that didn’t really keep the conversation moving. Sometimes when Lance got really emotional and cried, Keith would wipe the tears away and sometimes hug him. He liked it when Keith touched him, whether it be a hug or simply leaning on one another. 

Keith isn’t one for emotional stuff, Lance knew that. Sometimes he wish that Keith would come to him and talk about things on his mind. Lance wish he didn’t feel the need to run to Keith anytime he felt anything, good or bad. All he wanted to do is share things in his life with Keith. But Keith kept to himself and Lance always felt bad when he bothered him with his emotions. 

Lance hasn’t seen Keith cry often and when he does cry it isn’t for very long and he usually doesn’t want to talk about it. Lance knows that Keith has been through a lot and he has   
trouble showing and conveying how he is feeling. Lance has made it his personal mission to get Keith to trust him enough to open up completely. Lance was patient. 

Hunk didn’t have any leftovers. So Lance settled for a bowl of food goo. He sat down at the counter to eat.

The flashes of the nightmare swarmed back into his head. The things dream Keith had said shook him to his very core. “I felt so sorry for you. I felt obligated. He is hideous. Dumber than a sack of rocks. Emotional shit.” The words echoed so loudly Lance didn’t even hear the door open. He pushed his hands on his ears as if it would silence the vicious monotone that rang in his head. Tears were running down his face again and he shook violently as he let himself cry. 

He jumped and screamed when he felt a hand touch his shoulder.

“Lance, what’s wrong?” a concern voice said gently.


	3. The Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance talks to Keith. Not about what he wants to talk about but about Keith's new mission.

Lance looked up at Keith with tears in eyes. What was he supposed to tell him? That a stupid nightmare made him this upset? No. Then he would have to tell Keith about Andrew and that was not something he wanted to relive right now. 

“Just a bad dream. It isn’t a big deal.” Lance said trying to brush it off and wipe the last tear on his face. Lance knew he could trust Keith but he didn’t want to burden him with his problems. AGAIN.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Keith said with genuine concern in his eye. He raised his hand to put Lances back. Lance flinched at the sight of the raised hand. Keith quickly put space between. Lance felt bad. He wanted the physical touch. It was just instinct after the nightmare. But he didn’t want to tell Keith. 

“No. It’s fine, really.” Lance said not making eye contact with Keith.   
Keith looked like he wanted to push more but decided against the idea. Lance wished he would push more, force him to deal with the situation. But he knew Keith did not need the extra stress with all of his Blade of Mammora training.

“What are you even doing up this early?” Lance said to Keith when he realized it was 5 o’clock in the morning.

“I got back from the last mission late. Couldn’t sleep. Besides, I don’t know how anyone can sleep with Shiro and Allura arguing.”

“Again? It seems that is all those two ever do anymore is fight. The only thing they CAN agree on is extensive training.” Lance said sadly. He used to be jealous Allura decided to be with Shiro but in the end he was happy to see the two so happy together. At least they were until Shiro returned. There was something off about Shiro since he came back to the team but he couldn’t put his finger on it. 

“Did your mission at least go well?” Lance asked Keith hoping to keep him around longer. He did not really want to be alone.

“I guess. I mean we gathered some useful information about a Galra base. We are planning to attack it next week. Unfortunately, the base will require us to travel a ways so the mission will take about four months to complete.” Keith said not making eye contact with Lance.

Lance’s heart broke a little. The man of his dreams was about to leave for four month on an attack where he might not survive. Keith had a tendency to run into a fight sword flying without thinking things through first. He might never see him again. Now he really couldn’t tell Keith about the nightmare or ask him how he truly felt. That would distract from the mission and according to the Blades of Mammora the mission was the most important thing. Even at the expense of Keith’s life. 

“I know you will succeed. You are their biggest asset. And our biggest loss.” He whispered the last part so Keith couldn’t hear. He wanted to talk to him about seeing Shiro in the astral plane and his suspicions that the current Shiro may not be Shiro at all. He needed Keith’s leadership and guidance in this situation. But again that was just another distraction to take away from Keith’s mission. 

Lance knew how much Shiro means to Keith. He watched him close up like a clam when they lost Shiro the last time. To tell him that this wasn’t Shiro would either consume Keith completely or turn him against Lance. Besides what if he was wrong? What if seeing Shiro in the astral plane was just a dream? What if his thoughts that something was off about Shiro was just the trauma of him being kidnapped by the Galra again? No he would not bother with a hunch. 

“Lance, I appreciate the flattery but the Blade has many key players in this game. My Mother being one of them.” Keith trailed off. 

Lance could tell this was not something Keith wanted to talk about. But he found his mom! That should be something right?

“So you found your mother? Is she as fine as you are?” Lance said in his most flirtatious voice with a wink. He hoped this would break the tension in the room.

Keith rolled his eyes. “I am going to bed, need to be up early to get some training in. If you have anymore bad dreams or just want to talk, you know where to find me.”

“Yeah. Thanks man. Goodnight.” Lance said in a monotone looking down at his untouched food goo.

“Goodnight Lance.” Keith said as he left the room.


	4. Morning Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance confides in Hunk

Lance woke up with a start when Hunk entered the kitchen. He didn’t realize his exhaustion consumed him the minute he had put his head down.

“You okay Lance?” Hunk said with concern.

“Man I had a super bad dream about Andrew and Keith and I couldn’t sleep so I came to get some food then Keith came in and then apparently I fell asleep beside my food goo.” Lance rambled everything on his mind as he put his face in his hands. 

Hunk and Lance had been best friends since they started at the Garrison. Lance could always talk to Hunk and never worried about how he would react. Hunk always knew the best way to respond to Lance having a breakdown. Especially over Keith. 

“Andrew? As in the abusive ex roommate Andrew? You haven’t heard from him have you? Not that you would since we are in space but you know what I mean. What made you think of him?” Hunk with slight panic mixed with concern in his voice. He was genuinely concerned about Lance especially when Lance opened up about Andrew about a month into living together at the Garrison. 

“ No. I have no idea why I would dream about him. Maybe scared that I will become him or Keith will become like him. I don’t know Hunk.” 

Lance was mad at himself now. He knew better than to think he or Keith could ever be like Andrew. Then again he didn’t think Andrew would be like Andrew in the beginning. 

“Well Keith is going to need you now more than ever. I don’t know what you had a dream about but I know Keith is really upset right now.” Hunk said bluntly.

“Why? What happened? What’s wrong? Where is he?” Lance said fear in his voice that something happened.

“I overheard Keith and the Blade of Marmora this morning talking. From what I could gather Keith isn’t allowed to go on this mission. Explicit orders from a lady I swear I heard him call mom. And where does Keith always go when he is upset. I don’t think I need to spell that one out for you.” Hunk said. 

Hunk was right of course. Anytime Keith was upset he would go train with the settings up as high as he think he could handle without being killed. Lance worried about him abusing himself like that but at the same time he knew it was what he needed to calm down. 

“Before you go into dangerous territory let me make you some breakfast the Hunk way. Never confront anything on an empty stomach.” Hunk said proudly.

“Hunk you say not to anything on an empty stomach.” Lance looked at his untouched food goo and heard his stomach growl. “But you may have a point.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait everyone. Between school and life it has been crazy. I will try and keep this more updated so you don't have to wait nearly a year for the next chapter. This chapter wasn't much but it shows the trust Lance has with Hunk as a parallel to Keith with Shiro when that portion of the story comes into play. I am working on Chapter 5 now.


	5. Talk It Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance finds out what happens with his mother and something amazing happens

After a filling breakfast thanks to Hunk, Lance went to find Keith who was still getting his ass kicked in training.

“Dude one of these days you’re going to get yourself killed.” Lance said to Keith as he entered the arena. 

“End Simulation. Lance what are you doing here?” Keith asked as he put his blade away and wiped sweat from his untamed mullet. 

“Hunk told me you had a fight with your mother this morning. Do you want to talk about it?” Lance asked with concern in his eyes. 

“How did Hunk know about my mother?” Keith asked a little forcefully.

“ He overheard you talking to her and the Blade of Marmora about your mission. What happened?”

“My MOTHER thinks the mission is too dangerous for me to go on, and the rest of the Blade agreed with her. They still think I need to be with Voltron in case something happens. I am not even a paladin anymore so it isn’t like I am of any use.” He spit mother like venom. Lance could tell he was obviously still upset, even if he had been training for who knows how many hours. 

“Well you are still a part of Voltron and who knows they may be right, you may have to take over as paladin again if something happened.” Lance thought of the Shiro situation. “Plus if they think it is too dangerous then they are probably right. I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Thanks man. But nothing is going to happen, especially now that Shiro is now back rightfully in charge. I am just here to stand on the sidelines and that drives me insane.” Keith said throwing a punch into the nearest wall. 

“Easy Keith. You really are going to hurt yourself. What does Shiro have to say about this?” Lance said softly trying with every fiber in his body not to tell Keith about his suspicions about Shiro. But he knew how close Shiro and Keith are. He is the only one Keith has ever trusted to open up to.

“I haven’t talked to him yet. He has been a little preoccupied with other things. I will get over it. I just don’t see how a woman who barely knows me has any responsibility for my well-being. “

“I mean you were out there with her for two years so she has to at least know you a little by now.” 

“Two years does not make up for 16 years without her. She doesn’t just get to walk into my life and make decisions for me. “

“Maybe not, but she does get to make decisions for the Blade. An organization by which you are a member. So as much as it sucks you still have to respect her choice. “

Keith sighed “You’re right. That is part of the reason I am in here. I can’t do anything about the decision that has been made. However I can make the most out of what I can do while I am here. For the next few nights how about I stay with you in your room just in case you have anymore nightmares. I’ll bring my mattress and sleep on the floor.”

Lance was bursting with excitement. First, Keith opens up to him about how he is feeling and then he wants to bunk with him. He would much rather have Keith in his bed than on his floor but he wasn’t going to push his chances. “ I would like that. More than anything. But there is someone I need to tell you about…his name is Andrew…”


End file.
